Tuesday, April 22

14 years

Well with the passing of my birthday comes another anniversary. Today is Earth Day and it is also the 14Th Anniversary of the day my mom passed away. I remember in the first few years I cried so much, especially during year number 2 when everything was changing so much and I felt things would never be normal again. I am so grateful that most days now when I think of my mom I smile and not cry, God has replaced the mourning with gladness just like his word said. It took a lot of circumstances, time, and growing up for God to show me that normal is a relative term and that it constantly changes. I realized yesterday that in just a few days I will have been without my mom as long as she was with me, as I type that it brings tears to my eyes to realize that though she shaped who I would become and was such an important part of my life in the beginning that influence has been gone for half of my life. I believe with everything in me that this is God's good plan for my life and for hers. We all have an appointed number of days here on this earth, sometimes I think of a Legacy and what should I leave behind and I think of the following quote...

100 Years From Now

One hundred years from now
It will not matter
What kind of car I drove,
What kind of house I lived in,
How much I had in my bank
Nor what my clothes looked like.
One hundred years from now
It will not matter
What kind of school I attended,
What kind of typewriter I used,
How large or small my church,
But the world may be ...
a little better because...
I was important in the life of a child.

Forest Witcraft, "Within My Power"

Mom in her 20's

God placed me in the family that would mold me and would take me down the path of life He had planned for me. My mom's legacy is in the children she left behind, that have now all grown into adults. She was not perfect but she was important to us. Some of the lessons she taught are better left behind but some of them stick with me to this day. That is part of God's gift to me.

I do want to share some of the things that I loved about my mom and attempt to honor her today. Her name was Deborah Kay but everyone called her Debi. She loved with everything she could and when she loved you that was it, she did it all the way. She always stood up for my sister, brothers and me (even when it turned out we were wrong in the end). She listened to me talk... everyday it seems I would come home from school and tell her all about my day the good the bad and WAY too many details. (I tell all the details when I tell a story in case no one noticed hehe) She always listened and gave advice.

One of my favorite memories of her is that when I was growing up we would be riding down the street and she would turn the oldies station up as loud as she could and make the car "dance" down the road. I have done this a couple of times on deserted back roads... usually when I hear "In the Summertime" Sung by Derek Sherinian, this was "our" song (Mom & us kids). It would be cranked up loud and sung at highest volumes possible.

Mom playing and having fun

Thank you Lord for your sovereignty, thank you for being in control and giving me this wonderful life. I praise you for creating me and placing me in the family that you have. So often I have wanted to question your plans for me when they don't look like I want them to, but when I look back on my life I see your hand leading and guiding me through the places and times, Thank you. Please be with my family today and make it a day of thanksgiving for everyone. Thank you for saving me and making me apart of your family. Please be with all the family that have choosen to be family to me as well. I love you, Amen.

My Family Krystal, Kendra, Hank, Jake Debi & JR. 1987


Anonymous said...

OH KENDRA...it is official I am a loser! How many years will it take for me to remember YOUR MOM'S day!!!!!!!!!??????? AGH! I could just kick myself.
Please forgive me for being insensitive...it was certainly NOT intentional.
The post is wonderful. And that 2nd pic reminds me so much of Krystal...the eyes!!! And you know I love that family pic...those cute boys!!! :)
So glad you are part of our family. What a blessing you are to us in so many ways. We LOVE your stories chopped FULL of details...never stop. And we love your tears. Your honesty. We love the way you LOVE just like your MOM...with all you are and 100%. When I read the poem you posted I think of YOU and my children. The time, energy and MOUNDS of love you invest in them. They are so rich!
Forgive me...and KNOW that you are loved...no matter how terrible my little brain!

Anonymous said...

This post brought tears to my eyes! How kind of God to turn your mourning to gladness!!! He is awesome!! We love you girl, and we are so thankful to God for placing you in our lives!!! Thank you for your kindness to my girls (and to me). We love you!!!!! ~Lynette

Iturblog said...

Awe I hadn't realized you had been without your Mom for so long! :( Thanks for the reminder that even through the midst of our pain, God is good! It was sweet to read the impact your mother made on your life. You have definitely made an impact on those around you! You are such an encouragement! Thanks for sharing this sweet post and pictures! Love you!