Saturday, October 27

Is God Good???

What determines weather I believe God is good or not? This is the question that I have been reminding myself this past week or so (or more honestly probably the past couple of years) If you have viewed the Solus blog lately you know we discussed temptations singles face this past week. (this is actually from September.) For me the strongest temptation I face is believing that God is good when I don't get what I want. Now this can be on small levels, but usually it is in the overarching theme of I am single. Sometimes if feels like a disease, not a gift. As I have been thinking through this I know that I make choices sometimes because I think I have to fix my life. I have to move ahead. Mostly I don't think these things through because I know if I do then I will see what God wants me to do (wait and trust) that is a scary prospect because what if God wants me to remain single. I don't want that so how could God be good... this is where preaching the Gospel to myself and being open and honest with others in my life is key. The sad part about it all is I know the truth and I can tell you all day that God saved me not to make me happy but to bring himself glory. To give me a life filled with joy in him alone. Since I first started typing this blog I have been so blessed to discuss what it means to be a single christian woman. As I am now in my late 20's I deal with the struggle that all I have ever really wanted for my life is to be a wife and a mother but that dream is not a reality for me today. What does this say about God, and what does it say about me?? First off I could think or tell myself that God doesn't really love me. But the truth is HE DOES, he loves me enough that for today he has gifted me as a single I have a role to play in this life and purpose to fill. I am able to pour myself into the lives of others to build relationships that would have been more limited if I was married. I have to learn (as Carolyn McCulley has so perfectly said) to trust God with this hope defferred. To lean not on my own understanding because my own understanding would say I need to make something happen. God is good. I can trust Him and Him alone. He is in control and completely sovereign. I can enjoy the amazing family I have found sometimes in my own but on an everyday practical basis through this amazing body of believers He has placed me in. Well this is my joy and my struggle. Right now I am smiling thinking of my "gift" that I didn't ask for but God has graciously given me and supplied all I need to enjoy it. For those of you who haven't heard of Carolyn McCully please check her out at her blog Solo Feminity She has also written a book that I would recommend for anyone who is waiting on God for anything Click here to check it out Did I Kiss Marriage Goodbye (Trusting God with a Hope Deffered).


Anonymous said...

Great Blog. I hate waiting on ANYTHING. I am married but must wait on many other things. I often find myself not trusting and wondering if God really is good. I know that God has blessed ME and our family through YOU and you would be limited if not single. Not that I want you to stay single...I desire nothing but JOY in your life. And I know Marriage could bring that. But THANK YOU for the true joy you display before us. Thank you for reminding us to speak truth to ourselves and I LOVE the book DID I KISS MARRIAGE GOOD-BYE. I speaks volumes to me even as a married woman! :)

Anonymous said...

and for the record...GOD IS GOOD...but you and I KNOW that, we just have to be reminded sometimes! :)
I love you!

Anonymous said...

Love ya, Kendra. I pray for you. Thank you for sharing your heart. And thank you for all the serving you do!